My family has been dealing with a lot of loss lately, and honestly, I am not too sure what to make of it. My Uncle Bick passed away very recently, and as I reflect on our trip to San Francisco last week to deliver our final goodbyes, I am filled with so many different sentiments. As mothers, we have to remember that we too are human, which means we will experience a lot of emotion at times.
I think I was pregnant with Mr. President #2 the first time Mr. President #1 saw me cry. I was already hormonal and emotional, and something I was watching on the television just really did it for me. At first I was a little embarrassed when Mr. President #1 looked at me and said, "Are you crying, Mommy?" I initially attempted to hide the tears, but then I realized something...everybody cries at times; let me just explain to him what is happening here.
When I told Mr. President #1 that I was actually crying happy tears, he looked at me like I was crazy. I scooped up Mr. President #1, put him on my lap, and explained to him, "We all have happy and sad tears. Sometimes we just get so happy that we cry happy tears, and sometimes we feel so hurt that we cry sad tears. But the good news is that when we cry sad tears, eventually we become strong again." Mr. President #1 hopped up out of my lap, ran over to the table, grabbed a tissue and brought it back to me. When he extended his arm to me [tissue in hand] it was a sure sign he truly understood me.
I know some experts might argue that we should never let our children see us cry, or at least never let them see our vulnerable side, but what about happiness? Laughter and smiling are both expressions of happiness, which we all know is just another emotion. Should we hide our laughter and joy from our children too? Of course not! That would just be absurd.
With all of that being said, sometimes it's just necessary to LET IT OUT! When a loved one passes away...CRY. When the dog dies...CRY. When your son takes his first steps...CRY. When you close on your first house...CRY! Whether they're sad tears of tears of joy, life wouldn't be complete without the ups and downs. If those little ones see you shedding a few tears, just tell them why, and everything else will be just fine.
To my loved ones who have made a home in heaven...I shed a tear for you too. May you rest in eternal peace. Until we meet again...